Jobs and CareersI lost my voice for Thanksgiving. Days before that, I thought I might be coming down with something, but took my usual route of powering through it. After all, I had obligations. For instance, I had classes to teach, clients to coach, readings to do, and people counting on me. I didn't have time to be sick. I told myself, "stop whining, keep moving and you will feel better tomorrow."
Tomorrow came and went and instead of feeling better, I was worse. This continued until one morning I could barely get out of bed. My body took over as central control and informed me that there would be only lying down from here on out. I reluctantly obeyed but insisted to my family that I would be fine for Thanksgiving, just two days away, so come on down. Immediately after they arrived, I lost my voice ... for four days. Just imagine what torture that was.
I was upset about this turn of events. Sitting on the couch, unable to speak and feeling guilty, I wondered how I could let this happen. Searching for guidance, I picked up the book the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz and opened it at random. I read something like this: Always do your best. Your best will change from time to time as you are happy, sad, tired, energetic, sick, or hopeful. Do your best each day and then you can't judge yourself or suffer from guilt, blame and self punishment.
Here was simple, brilliant guidance. Had I been focused on doing my best? Not really. There is an element of acceptance in doing your best and I was not accepting the messages my body was sending. I was trying to will my way through something I did not want to accept. I was pushing myself too hard to complete everything I committed to do and then yelling at myself for not being physically able to do it all, until I collapsed into a sick bed. Knowing when to stop, when enough is enough, when good is good enough, these are examples of doing your best.
It is easy to fall prey to this kind of behavior at this time of year. Expectations run high and trying too hard is rampant. The idea that there's so much to do, no time to waste or relax drives us to keep moving and keep working creating a punishing undercurrent that drives us relentlessly. Missing the mark or falling short of a goal is just an opportunity to be hard on ourselves. Enter the whip of recrimination; if we treated our friends the way we treat ourselves we'd be lonely --or in jail.
It is time to stop the madness.
What changes as soon as you stop trying so hard and focus only on doing your best? Stop for a moment and breathe in that question and you will feel a shift in your energy. Your energy moves from concentrated, tight, and forced to relaxed, open, and flowing. You move from judging yourself to trusting the process.
You'll know you are doing your best when you are fully present to the moment and what you are doing. You are neither rushing to completion nor thinking about everything else you have to do. In this way, your effort is absolute even if your results vary.
When you do your best, you feel complete; you know when to stop and when good is good enough. You stop questioning your efforts and your inner critic and judge disappear. Instead, you step into your inner wisdom, begin to relax, and surprise of surprise, start being kind to yourself.
Starting right now, I am giving up being hard on myself. 2009 is the year I change that old "agreement" to one of being kind and supportive to myself by always doing my best. My spirit knows being kind to myself means I am being kind to the Divine too. This is one resolution I know I will keep.
If this speaks to you, please join me and make this the year you always do your best starting with how you treat yourself.
Action Steps:
Ask yourself what old agreement or behavior do you want to give up?
What new agreement do you want to replace it with for 2009?
Give yourself permission to get clear and let your heart speak; it knows where you need to be kinder to you. Now, honor your agreement by writing it on a piece of paper and signing it. You have made a sacred contract with yourself.
Finally, as a reminder, write it on an index card, post it note, or your screen saver so you have a visible reminder of your new commitment. You might just find you are the friend you have been waiting for.***
------------------------------------
By Tara Crawford Roth
Tara Crawford Roth is a Certified Business Coach and an Intuitive Alchemist. Her clients are successful professionals who want something more out of life in terms of career, personal relationships, spiritual connection or a general experience of renewed meaning to life.
Tomorrow came and went and instead of feeling better, I was worse. This continued until one morning I could barely get out of bed. My body took over as central control and informed me that there would be only lying down from here on out. I reluctantly obeyed but insisted to my family that I would be fine for Thanksgiving, just two days away, so come on down. Immediately after they arrived, I lost my voice ... for four days. Just imagine what torture that was.
I was upset about this turn of events. Sitting on the couch, unable to speak and feeling guilty, I wondered how I could let this happen. Searching for guidance, I picked up the book the Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz and opened it at random. I read something like this: Always do your best. Your best will change from time to time as you are happy, sad, tired, energetic, sick, or hopeful. Do your best each day and then you can't judge yourself or suffer from guilt, blame and self punishment.
Here was simple, brilliant guidance. Had I been focused on doing my best? Not really. There is an element of acceptance in doing your best and I was not accepting the messages my body was sending. I was trying to will my way through something I did not want to accept. I was pushing myself too hard to complete everything I committed to do and then yelling at myself for not being physically able to do it all, until I collapsed into a sick bed. Knowing when to stop, when enough is enough, when good is good enough, these are examples of doing your best.
It is easy to fall prey to this kind of behavior at this time of year. Expectations run high and trying too hard is rampant. The idea that there's so much to do, no time to waste or relax drives us to keep moving and keep working creating a punishing undercurrent that drives us relentlessly. Missing the mark or falling short of a goal is just an opportunity to be hard on ourselves. Enter the whip of recrimination; if we treated our friends the way we treat ourselves we'd be lonely --or in jail.
It is time to stop the madness.
What changes as soon as you stop trying so hard and focus only on doing your best? Stop for a moment and breathe in that question and you will feel a shift in your energy. Your energy moves from concentrated, tight, and forced to relaxed, open, and flowing. You move from judging yourself to trusting the process.
You'll know you are doing your best when you are fully present to the moment and what you are doing. You are neither rushing to completion nor thinking about everything else you have to do. In this way, your effort is absolute even if your results vary.
When you do your best, you feel complete; you know when to stop and when good is good enough. You stop questioning your efforts and your inner critic and judge disappear. Instead, you step into your inner wisdom, begin to relax, and surprise of surprise, start being kind to yourself.
Starting right now, I am giving up being hard on myself. 2009 is the year I change that old "agreement" to one of being kind and supportive to myself by always doing my best. My spirit knows being kind to myself means I am being kind to the Divine too. This is one resolution I know I will keep.
If this speaks to you, please join me and make this the year you always do your best starting with how you treat yourself.
Action Steps:
Ask yourself what old agreement or behavior do you want to give up?
What new agreement do you want to replace it with for 2009?
Give yourself permission to get clear and let your heart speak; it knows where you need to be kinder to you. Now, honor your agreement by writing it on a piece of paper and signing it. You have made a sacred contract with yourself.
Finally, as a reminder, write it on an index card, post it note, or your screen saver so you have a visible reminder of your new commitment. You might just find you are the friend you have been waiting for.***
------------------------------------
By Tara Crawford Roth
Tara Crawford Roth is a Certified Business Coach and an Intuitive Alchemist. Her clients are successful professionals who want something more out of life in terms of career, personal relationships, spiritual connection or a general experience of renewed meaning to life.
Jangan Lupa Share Artikel Ini Ya...?
Bagikan artikel ini ke temanmu melalui "SosMed" kamu di bawah ini:
Bagikan artikel ini ke temanmu melalui "SosMed" kamu di bawah ini:
Posts
